Jerry's Kaz Massage...

Jerry’s account of the massage: Well when I got over to the sports center for my massage I had in my mind a nice relaxing massage with calming music and a fan blowing, right? Wrong, It was this Russian guy with the hardest fingers I have ever felt, he must do finger pushups half the day to be that strong. The room was pretty hot with a massage table and a single towel. I guess I wasn’t suppose to get under the towel, because when he came in he motioned for me to get on top of the towel. He started with my back, on either side of my spine, at first I thought he was trying to see what my spine bones felt like because he was pressing so hard, but I soon figured out it was the relaxing part of the massage. I tried to relax, but it was kind of uncomfortable. I started thinking about when my wife got a Thai massage one time, where this lady poked her all over her body really hard, it was kind of what it was like. It was like when somebody grabs your collar muscle and squeezes real hard, well that was his touch all the time. Once he got done with my spine he jumped up on my back and started cracking my back every few inches by jumping up and down with his feet. A few thoughts raced through my mind about what if I die, how will they ever find me. Once he was done with my spine he rubbed the sides of my back till they were burning hot. Then to my legs, I’m slightly ticklish, so I tensed up for most of the time, trying not to laugh, it hurt so much it was funny. I didn’t know my legs had so many sore spot in them. I only yelped a few times on the first leg, the other side I knew what to expect so that was better; I knew I would at least survive. At the end of each leg massage he would bend by leg at the knee backward all the way back, kind of like the splits, I squawked a few times, but it didn’t seem to stop him from doing it. I was sweating from head to toe by the time he was done with my legs. Then he did my arms which was not so bad, it was bearable. Then he did my face, oh my, that was weird, at one point I thought he was going to somehow pop my eyeballs out, or so I thought, so funny. Then he cracked my neck 3-4 times and then pulled on my arms and legs till I thought they were going to come off. I was so glad when it was over, It was really relaxing to know that I had made it, no broken bones or broken neck. Nothing was even dislocated. My kink in my back is gone, so he did work that out, or actually I think he scared all the bad chi out of my body :) So that was my Kaz massage, Jerry

*I tried to find a picture of Ewana nd Charley getting their massages in Almaty... but nothin'!! - c*